Why is Gossiping ?

October 13, 2008

WHY IS GOSSIPING?

Many Thinkers and Experts are not in a position to give defined and specific causes for developing gossip in oneself. Any discomfort or ill feel may ease seed to gossip. The causes which are responsible for gossip might be

v Lack of self-confidence,
v Lack of motivation,
v Lack of self-reliance,
v Lack of self-control,
v Not willing to accept new things,
v Not willing to know new things,
v Not interested in adopting the situation,
v Not appreciating or recognizing others,
v Not willing to pave a way to others,
v Feeling of incompatibility,
v Feeling of dissatisfaction
v Feeling of insecurity,
v Feeling of desperation,
v Feeling of separation,
v Feeling of being isolated,
v Self-projective,
v Self-exhibitory,
v Self-esteem,
v Demanding respect,
v Demanding recognition,
v Relaying on others,
v Informal communication,
v Inferiority feeling,
v Individualistic approach,
v Power motive,
v Authoritative,
v Dominative,
v Dormant,
v No self-efficacy,
v No empathetic dealings,
v No creative thinking,
v No clear vision,
v Pride,
v Prejudice,
v Covert,
v Introvert,
v Impertinence
v Conflicting goals,
v Confusing ideas,
v Contradicting thoughts,
v Mentality to achieve through back door ways,
v Not to withstand but to manage,
v Not to face but to escape,
v Not to challenge but to accommodate,
v Not to penetrate but to restrict,
v Not to sort but to resort,
v Not to identify but to dilute,
v Not to transparent but to reveal,
v Not to prove but to approve,
v Not to act but to shrink,
v Not to think but to feel,
v Not to enter but to trespass,
v Not to fit but to split,
v Not to pass but to bypass,
v Not to accept but to adjust,
v Not to believe hard work but smart work,
v Not to appreciate but to be appreciated,
v Not to empower but to encroach,
v Not to take ownership of ones own but of others,
v Not to claim failure but success alone,
v Not to try but to reach,
v Not to involve but to participate,
v Not to filter but to silt,
v Not to encourage but to encounter,
v Not to enrich but to enlarge alone,
v Not to delegate but to eliminate,
v Not to listen but to avoid,
v Not to entrust but to thrust,
v Not to trust but only to suspect,
v Not to bend but to end (flexibility)
v Not to win but to escape,
v Not to synchronize but to be synthetic

The Remedies

As the causes of gossiping are seem to be psychological and spontaneous the reason or reasons for it will not be explicit or apparent. The other person cannot infer the right reason instantaneously when he/she experiences the gossip. It is the outcome of implied contractual implications between two persons or among many persons for anything. So it binds both sides i.e. gossiping person or group and experiencing person or group.

The individuals can overcome the gossip by executing the principle “a thing can be destroyed in such a way it is constituted.” The persons involved should find the basic reason or reasons inbuilt and the mutual exchange of queries, views, opinions, reasons, causes, incidents, inferences, understanding, analysis and interpretation, that they experienced or felt during the course. Raise what?, Why?, When? and How? Questions in oneself and analyze the cause or causes as mentioned above or any other cause. Identify and nullify the roots causing the gossip. Moreover it might be controlled by

· Mutual exchanging of the subject matter.
· Making things transparent and direct.
· Making oneself competitive.
· Stand erect and look straight policy.
· Self-analysis.
· Self-Confident and self-control.
· Empathetically approaching.
· Solve or settle it before getting accumulated, twisted, mounted, diverted, boosted or dropped
· Complete clarification of queries and doubts.
· Timely response and accurate feedback.

Gossip cannot be stopped completely from human beings as most of the reason / reasons for the occurrence is/are unique. The complexity and differences exist in cognition, perception, attitudes and behavior of the individuals involved and the environment are responsible for developing the gossip.

About the Author;

Dr. A. Oliver Bright,
Professor and Head,
Department of Management Studies,
Francis Xavier Engineering College,
Tirunelveli, Tamil Nadu.
E-mail : aobright67@yahoo.co.in
Mobile : 9442398310

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